What can I say? I'm experiencing a lull in my social life. I met my Dale last week, on a Wednesday. It was great and we had a lot of laughs trying out names for his new bike. It's arriving sometime this month, a BMW R1150RT. He wanted to name it Thor, the god of thunder, but I thought that was a bit too predictable a name for such a big machine. So we joked about names a bit and agreed on Big Bilog.

bilog (bee - LOWG). adj. round

We found it extremely funny. It made no sense whatsoever but it was so darn hilarious. Probably because my Dale is as big a bilog as anything. He's not obese; he looks really smart and confident, and he has large hands and feet so he doesn't look cute. He looks formidable not because of his size, but because of his aura, his character.

We talked about the Iron Butt rally that's held in the US and his plan to invite a friend or two to do a similar thing around Luzon. I begged and begged to be taken along but he kept saying it was not an easy thing to arrange. Of course, I understood at once that taking your girlfriend on a trip with friends who know your wife personally was not a smart thing to do. But I begged, anyway.

One thing that worried me was that he increasingly became restless during the time we were together. I asked him about it but he didn't give me a straight answer. I'd told him about my pending application for a job overseas earlier, in the car on the way to the motel but, at that time, he didn't show any surprise or shock. He even said that I should try everything. I got to thinking about it because he usually calls me up on Monday, right after the weekend and, well, it's Wednesday and I haven't heard from him yet.

Was he trying to end it that night? Or perhaps making up his mind to break up? Or maybe it was something else altogether, like going off somewhere on the bike together. Maybe he doesn't have time or won't have the opportunity to take me without his wife hearing about it. When he does call, I'll have to ask him again.

In the meantime, I've been keeping to myself, masturbating. I've no energy to meet anyone else. Tom arrived in Manila last week, was supposed to have called sometime later but never did. Art was in town three weeks ago, called to say hi and promised to call later, hinting about meeting up, but he never did. Jake sent text messages a couple of times but I didn't reply.

I'm tired. I need a change of pace, a change of scenery. I need to get back to regular working hours.

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M.Beck

Nice blog, i stumbled across this site when i type in "mutual gratification" on google. which is a bit mad.

:)

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Emyn Galad

Hey, there, stranger! LOL! Thanks for dropping by. And, yes, you have to be a bit mad to get into my universe...

It's called serendipity.

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travs

I'd like to trade link with you. my blog is at http://123filipina.thumblogger.com

you can PM me there